Week 11: Lucky ME

When I ended my relationship with my first fiance, in 1994, (after he cheated on me), I was told by several people that it "just wasn't meant to be". Years later, when I fell in love with Doug, I felt like I had finally found "my person", the one I was meant to be with. When he died on his motorcycle, four days before our wedding, I was overcome with anger. I didn't know if I should be angry at God, or if I was doomed or cursed, or just one of the most unlucky people in the world. It had taken me 26 years to find "the love of my life". I realized that there was a chance I would never find love again.

I wasn't ready to even attempt dating for about a year and a half. I never was one to date just for the sake of dating, just to have someone in my life. I was okay with being on my own, and would rather that, than be with the wrong person. I would NOT settle. I wanted to find someone who could be my best friend. Believe me, I had my doubts. How could someone as "unlucky" as me, expect to find love for the second time, even though there are many people who never find it even once?

"Luck" is a very complicated word. Some decisions we make change our lives forever (I made the difficult but extremely smart decision to end the relationship with my first fiance). Other things happen to us (good and bad) that we have no control over. I made the right decisions to end the relationships with the three guys I dated before Jim. So, that part has nothing to do with luck. But, to me, the word "lucky" just means appreciating the good in your life and not taking it for granted. So, finding Jim, and finding love not once, but twice makes me incredibly "lucky".

(This week, we have been lucky enough to spend the week on vacation in Florida, with my parents. I was lucky enough to buy an underwater camera before the trip and I knew the kind of shot I wanted. It turns out, that kissing underwater is no easy task! Since we both wear contacts we couldn't open our eyes underwater, so we had to somehow find each other's lips while staying underwater long enough and holding our breath. Doing that, while also holding the camera proved to be just about impossible. So, I'm cheating a bit this week. I got the camera set up, and let my 9 year old press the button. That is fitting, though, because after 2 years of infertility, tests, procedures. and a lot of "luck", Jim and I finally became a family of 3).