Week 24: I Was Framed
There were times in my past when the pain was so great that I couldn't imagine ever looking back on that time and being able to see any good in it. When my first fiance cheated on me, after being with him for 3 1/2 years, it left me bitter and untrusting.
When I finally healed and found Doug, (my second fiance), and then lost him four days before our wedding, after only getting to spend 10 wonderful months together, I felt so cheated and angry that not only was it hard to imagine life without him, but it was hard to get back to who I used to be before I met him. I came to realize that I never would. I was forever changed.
I realize now how much both of those experiences changed me; how much they framed the person I would become. From my first fiance I learned to never settle. I learned what kind of man I wanted, and what kind I didn't. I learned that people will let you down, and that forgiveness isn't for them, it is for you and letting your heart heal. From Doug I learned that the little things are actually the big things. I learned that you can tell a lot about a man by the way he treats his mother. I learned about the importance of letting the people in my life know how much they mean to me. I learned about how fragile life is, and the importance of truly appreciating all the good in it. I learned to make time for the things that bring me joy, and even more importantly for the people that I love. I learned that I was stronger than I ever knew.
I take all these lessons with me as I live and learn with Jim and Dylan. Our love, our family, and our experiences will all frame the person I continue to be... and the person I become. The best part is that I am able to look back and see all the good, and to look forward at all the good yet to come.